Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Boob sucka!

According to a new report from the CDC, boob sucking is getting to be very popular among the infant set these days. "The percentage of infants who were ever breastfed increased from 60% among infants who were born in 1993-1994 to 77% among infants who were born in 2005-2006." Preggers plans on breast feeding which should come as no surprise since in addition to the above statistic, "(b)reastfeeding rates among mothers 30 years and older were significantly higher than those of younger mothers." Breastfeeding seems like a no-brainer to me. That said, I'm pretty sure that I was formula fed and I turned out decent.

But what about the "man boob"?

Men have nipples. Why can't we breastfeed too? I guess, technically, we can. Men have mammary glands just like women, so we too are able to produce breast milk. But, at least according to Scientific American, "unless you are an Indonesian fruit bat, though, it probably won't happen naturally." Men have been know to lactate with hormone therapy or as a response to massive stress and/or starvation. Then there is this guy, a 38-year-old man in Sri Lanka who nursed his daughter after his wife died during childbirth and she faced starvation after rejecting formula. Wow, way to step up Dude! I was raised by a single dad but I am pretty sure he never went that far (thank god).

This little video from Australia absolutely killed me!


Okay, so maybe I won't go that far. But I'm looking forward to giving the occasional bottle. Preggers is planning on doing a little pumping to help her get back to work, take off a little pressure and/or increase the milk supply by creating a bigger demand, and to do a little storage for the lean times. I think a bottle will be fine for me. My nipples are for recreational purposes only. Besides, have you seen how hairy my chest is?

*If you are still looking for a baby shower gift there are some very practical pumping supplies on our registry.*

Monday, April 28, 2008

Ina May, Penny Simpkin, and me

A few months ago a co-worker of mine suggest that I pick up a copy of Ina May Gaskin's book Ina May's Guide to Childbirth for Preggers. I am incredibly glad that I did. It has turned out to be quite an inspiring read. She read it cover to cover and then asked me to read some as well. I am amazed how much I am enjoying it. She found it funny and inspiring and empowering. I am too. I hope to learn a little something from those hippy ladies. They do an excellent job of taking the fear out of the birth process and making it a spiritually invigorating experience. A lot of the stories make me laugh. I hope I will be able to laugh and enjoy our birth process.

I am also reading a book called The Birth Partner by internationally renown Seattle doula extraordinaire, Penny Simpkin. This is a fantastic supplement to our birthing classes. The hope is that the more I know about the process, and the more "tricks" I have up my sleeve, I less insecure I will be. Preggers and I talked a little about this last night. I want to be positive and productive part of the process and to be honest I am worried that I will just be an annoyance or in the way. Preggers is doing great about helping me keep my confidence up while not sugar-coating anything for me. I know I need to be strong. I have so much faith that she will be strong enough to do this. I just need to have some of that faith in my own strength. Believe it or not finding my own strength doesn't always come easy. For me, that security in myself usually comes through preparation and education. And the fact that I don't have any other choice. When the time comes will I be the best birth partner for my partner? I'm damn well going to try.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

New Dad - 1976 edition (part II)

Once again we travel back in time to the summer of 1976. The little one in this picture is Preggers. That guy is a new dad. Her new dad. Recognize that look of pride? Seems to be something they hand out in maternity wards. Wonder if I can get mine with a mustache too?

Thursday, April 24, 2008

After Birth

The reality of the post-birth actual baby is starting to set in. Last week was our postpartum session in our birthing classes at Gracewinds. It was a little surprising to learn how much goes on the woman's body after the birth. I don't know, I guess I just kind of figured it would all snap back in place. It only makes sense though that the process isn't instantaneous. After all, it takes 10 months for the woman's body to make the baby. It is bound to take a while for it all settle back in to place down south there.

But rather than dwell on the uncomfortable uterine contractions and weeks of bleeding, I am trying to help Preggers focus on the actual baby part. In that vein I have attempted to answer definitively the biggest question of the week. "What the baby will look like?" Not what will the baby look like when it is first born. We know it will come out looking like a mucus covered, cone headed, angry old man. I am trying to get a grip on what our kid will look like a little later. Working with a couple of photos of Preggers and I as kids, I think I have come up with a decent representation. I used essentially the same methodology as the great modern geneticist, Conan O'Brien. Granted, it is a little fuzzy in places and sort of gender-neutral since we won't know the sex until the baby gets here, but I think this turned out well.

So, what happens if we mix this girl -


With this boy -

Here is a pretty much 50/50 split of both Preggers and I at around 6-7 years old. It skews a little more toward my hair and there is a weird thing going on with the left ear (that big old right ear is all mine) but I think it is a pretty decent start. Pretty cute too in my opinion.
To get the full effect though you really need to see the morph. Like Michael Jackson's Black or White video. Crazy but fun. You can even pause the video as it moves to see what would happen with more or less of one person's characteristics

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

New Dad - 1976 edition

The year was 1976. Nearly 32 years to the day before our due date. The guy in the picture here is my dad. The sleepy little guy is me.

I have learned a lot from my dad over the years. I look forward to this new phase of life and all of the new lessons and experiences that we can share. While my experience will undoubtedly be very different from his, there is just so much that I know I will have to learn. He is a smart guy. I turned out ok. I am so proud that he is excited to be a grandpa. It's got to be hard for him in someways. It kinda forces him into a new phase of life and a new identity. I am sure he will find his own unique way of doing it though. He always does!

Saturday, April 19, 2008

I can see you

Spring my ass! We got snow last night! And thunder that shook the house! Is this April or the end of days? Ok, maybe it isn't all that bad. And it's not like this is Chicago or Saskatchewan or anything. It's just disconcerting when it was practically 80 degrees only a week ago.

But I digress. The big issue over here at Don't Eat The Baby is you. Yes, you. You are reading this blog and that absolutely amazes me. Or maybe I am exaggerating. After all, I really have no idea who visits this blog. Maybe it is just the "internet homeless" looking for a quiet, deserted place to drink their hooch and sleep in a corner. But maybe, just maybe, you actually care about the content.

Either way, I want to know.

So here is the plan. I'm getting rid of the poll on the left column that asks what gender you think the baby is. It's totally redundant anyway. I am going to replace it with a new poll. Besides, you should be voting in the pool! (What's that you say? You already have? Why not do it again?) Is it the $2 buy-in that is holding so many of you back? I won't really make you pay the $2. I mean, after all, you were planning on buying me the $3000 plasma tv on the registry anyway, right? The baby REALLY needs it. Or maybe it's that you don't care. That I can totally respect too.

But back to the poll. This time I want to know a little more about you. Why you're here. That kind of thing. The more I know about you the more I can get you to come back. The more you come back the bigger my ego gets. The bigger my ego gets the more I write. The more I write the less time I have to annoy my wife. You see the connection? So vote in the new poll, bet in the pool, and better yet leave a comment that way I don't feel so lonely.

I know you are there. I can hear you breathe.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The tough days

It has been a tough couple of days for New Dad. Thankfully I stumbled upon this clip this afternoon. As time goes by I think this type of reminder is going to be more and more important.



Be Happy.

That's pretty good advice.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Don't Drink The Baby

Some new dads hand out cigars when the new baby finally arrives. Me, I plan on handing out beer.
Tomorrow Meatglue and me are planning on brewing up a batch of IPA. Hopefully it will be done in 8 weeks when the baby is due. His girlfriend, Food, is pretty excited about making the labels too. She's all artsy and shit.

Got to be in the waiting room to get one though!

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

The Bloody Show

No pictures.
Well, ok, maybe this one. Seriously, what did you expect?

Last night was our third birthing class hence the title of this post. Bloody show is the actual name of the mucus plug that releases at the beginning of labor. In my opinion it should also be the title of the movie they showed last week. Or at least a term for labor. Its just a little more rock and roll than "labor". Labor just sounds like work. Bloody show has pazaz! "Honey, it's time for the bloody show!"

This week's class was actually really nice. A little massage techniques and a nice conversation about drugs. Planning, not panic. Last week left me pretty exhausted. Katie has been a little worried that I won't hold up my end of the bargain and that I am going to be a burden rather than a source of support. Sure, I'm freaked out. Isn't that to be expected? But these days I am feeling pretty confidant and strong in my ability to be the kind of partner that she requires. I think she is coming around to the idea too. Hell, if she can perform the bloody show the least I can do is move the scenery.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

The Registry


Some of you are kind and generous people.
Some of you are hippies.
Some are both.

You know who you are.

We aren't really doing a lot of the traditional Babys 'R Us kind of registry stuff. Instead we have built our own registry through the Alternative Gift Registry. This allows us to request gently used secondhand items and pieces that may not be available at your mega-retailers.

Nothing is purchased directly off the registry, instead it gives you ideas of what we want and some links to the items. Once you buy something please mark it off the list. It is pretty easy but does require that extra step. We appreciate you doing the extra work.

Why alternative gifts?
  • According to a 2006 article on CNN Money, the average new parents spend $6,200 buying their first year’s worth of baby products, including furniture, car seats, clothing, and toys. That’s a huge chunk of change for items that will generally be used for less than two years.
  • According to a 2005 poll by Redbook, 87 percent of expectant parents “anticipate that baby expenses will increase their stress level.” — Is it any wonder?

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

The Pool


Move over Bill Gates! I've figured out how I am going to become the next internet billionaire! Internet gambling is all the rage and if you are a big enough degenerate to visit my blog chances are already living hand to mount playing internet poker. But how can I cash in? A baby pool! That's right, what better way to plan for our child's future than robing our friends and family of their hard earned two dollar bills (euros and twonies gladly accepted). Who knows you might even make a little yourself! It's cheap so go nuts!

Click here or follow the permalink to the left.